Television
10 Signs You Have a ‘Scandal’ Addiction Problem
“Don’t look now, but those people staring at us..? They have a problem.”
I recently made the mistake of starting to watch Scandal on Netflix. As a result, I’ve abandoned my children, husband, work and general hygiene in favor of being glued to my iPad.
But it is SO worth it.
Think you might have a li’l Scandal addiction problem, too? Here are 10 tell-tale signs:
10. You growl at your toddler that he HAS to learn how to pee in the potty because he is a GLADIATOR, dammit!
9. You would give your life for one of Olivia’s white coats.
8. You constantly sweep your house for bugs.
7. Before you fix the time on your parents’ microwave, you put on a white hat.
6. All sexual encounters must be conducted in a closet or on the Oval Office desk.
5. When your husband spills beer on the new sofa, you cry, “WHAT. DID. YOU. DO?!”
4. You can’t even LOOK at a power drill without clutching your genitals anymore.
3. Accidentally double-booked two important work meetings? No problem. YOU CAN FIX THIS. YOU’RE A FIXER.
2. When the automated phone system tell you that you are out of options, you retort, “I am NEVER out of options!”
1. You find yourself creepily staring at people through conference room windows.
Celebrities
Watch Harry Styles Participate in Hilarious Prank on The Ellen DeGeneres Show
“Bro! Bro, bro, bro.”
During an appearance on Ellen, Harry Styles good-naturedly participated in Ellen DeGeneres’ classic hidden camera earpiece prank. This round’s unsuspecting participant? A pizza delivery guy.
The host’s initial instructions for the “Lights Up” singer were to “Open the door when he’s there and say, ‘Wassup?! Come in, bro.'” Styles dutifully followed the instructions, then he had to give the delivery guy a ton of fist bumps punctuated by an embarrassing amount of “bros.”
Repeating what the host prompted, Styles then asked the guy to hang out. “Here’s the thing, bro,” he said. “My entourage is stuck in traffic. I’m not used to being alone. Would you mind—this is embarrassing—just, kind of, sticking with me?” The delivery guy very kindly agreed to stay — and, as you’ll see, hilarity ensued.
We’ve spent countless Friday nights at home in our pajamas, drinking boxed wine and screaming at the couples on House Hunters that they should have picked house #3. (Seriously! Damon hates craftsman homes and Jenna’s going to regret getting that fixer-upper with the pink bathroom tiles!) So as a token of appreciation to our favorite HGTV show, here are just a few haikus we’ve written in celebration of it. (more…)
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